I remember this concert as one of the best ones, I have ever done. This picture is from Folken in Stavanger. (photo by: Wendy Bogert) I was so happy, and I had my whole life with music and stages in front of me. But the adventure with Sirenia ended one year after.
I will tell you my story! The story about my voice and why I left Sirenia. The true story!;)
When I was a child, I was doing a lot of gymnastics. When I was 11 years old I got very sick. I had inflammation in my appendictis, and I almost died. My mother was so afraid, but after a few months, I was okay again. But the doctor said, that I couldn’t make any more gymnastics for at least a half year. My body was not ready. So what should I do? I could sing some more. So I did. That was the beginning of my singing career. When I was 15 years old, I was singing every day. In 2 choirs and 3 bands. My whole life was about singing, and I LOVED it. I travelled with the choir, and went to a lot of competitions. BUT….I was also a crazy girl who loved to party and talk a LOT! After a weekend with the towns annual festival my voice was gone! I was talking to much under concerts, so I lost my voice. And I still tried to talk. After the festival and the week after I thought my voice would come back. But it didn’t. I could talk, but I couldn’t sing! My singing teacher said that she thought it was knots on my vocal cords.
My worst nightmare EVER startet there. Years went by, and my voice was still the same. I could sing very deep, but my high tones were completely gone. I was so sad and frustrated, and I went to several throat specialists and singing teachers, but they couldn’t find the problem. My only wish back then was to get my voice back. At the age of 19 I found a really skilled doctor, who only worked with singers. He filmed my throat, and finally I got the answer. When I was 15 years old on that festival, I had blood blastings on my vocal chords, and they became to scar tissues. The doctor told me that I had to live with that, but I could still sing, and I had to train my voice more! He also gave me some medicine, but that never worked. If only I could tell that stupid little 15-years old Monika to shut up and take care of her voice. But that girl really thought that she could do everything with her voice without problems.
After that I found my first band Sinphonia, and my voice got better. Much better, but I still had some problems with a few tones in the high register. I could sing totally high opera style, but there were a few notes in between, that was never good for me.
Listen to the first track I ever recorded here:
My voice doctor said, that maybe I could be cured and maybe I could get my voice back ,when I started singing every day and touring again. But the scar tissues were still there.
When I was singing with Sirenia the tones were still a problem. I was never cured:( So actually the problem was, that the band wrote many of the choruses in those tones. So yes it was musical disagreements that was the reason.
After my time i Sirenia I had a long break with music. I was so sad that my biggest dream was broken:( But I knew, that I could sing everything else than those stupid tones! So after a few years I started singing again, and I will never stop again. I know what my voice can do, and what it can’t do. And maybe those problems made my voice even stronger in some ways? 🙂